As my mother & kids dropped me off this morning for treatment, little did I think that Anthony & I would soon be coming out together & he would be the one to take me back home. But it happened again. Today as I sat getting my blood drawn, I was thinking "surely Lord my white count will be great today, since I didn't get anything last week!" The total wbc count was 3400 & my granulocytes were 600. When I saw the second one I immediately felt sick. Again, I'm all psyched up about getting another treatment down, but it wouldn't happen today. Anthony could see the disappointment as soon as he walked in the door & I immediately had tears in my eyes when I saw him. It's a feeling of what could I have done to prevent this again. I regretted the few sushi pieces I indulged in Saturday night. Everything ran through my mind. Too much shopping, not enough rest, around too many people...all those thoughts just kept racing. LeeAnn was surprised too. She went out & spoke with Dr. Mainwaring & came back & told me he wanted me to get a shot of Neupogen (wbc booster), with another one to follow on Friday. We will see what my count is then & determine when to start back on the cycle. Now I only have chemo twice a month & a bone strengthener at the end of each cycle. Hopefully we will start again on New Years Eve. What a way to bring in the new year!!
After having lunch with my hubby, I came home & slept pretty much all afternoon. My mother helped out with the kids & I slept until Anthony came home. The side effects of the shot are bone pain, & flu like symptoms. It has already hit me. Please pray for my granulocytes to come back up. The cut off was 750 in order to get treatment. I'm sorry this entry is short, but I'm tired & just not feeling up to typing at this point. Love to all!!
I trust that my Lord is taking care of me, by not allowing my body to be making what it needs. Evidently the chemo is still doing its job to cause me not to need it another week. The Lord knows my body better than anyone else. HE has me under his wing. I just struggle with questioning him sometimes. A friend gave me a 90 day devotional called "Praying Through Cancer". It has great scriptures that help remind me that he IS forever faithful. He knows my every need & to surrender it all to him. Every once in a while I need to step back & realize that I can't ever do this alone. I have to keep my eyes & thoughts on HIM.
You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, whose thoughts are fixed on you! Trust in the LORD always, for the LORD GOD is the eternal rock. Isaiah 26:3-4 NLT
About Me
- Arthanise
- Murfreesboro, TN, United States
- Mom of 2 precious, beautiful children of our Lord, Abby 12 & Austin 8. My husband Anthony & I have been married for 13 years. He makes me laugh. We also have 2 funny dogs, Winnie a Bichon & Lucy the Pug. I'm a Southern Baptist, conservative. I use to be a RN with my last job being on an oncology floor. I'm blessed with a wonderful, supportive family & awesome friends.
3 comments:
Dear Father,
I ask that you increase Arthanise's WBC. Even if it just one number over the requirement or so high that the doctor's see your face in the numbers. We know LORD that there are no words to convince you and that all of this is according to your will. You tell us to bring everything to you, and so we do. Abba, we praise you for all thing and in all things. Forgive our doubts and release our fears. Bring us healing and make us whole once again, in your name and by the blood of your son Jesus.
Amen.
As I continue to pray for you, I looked up the verse you have at the end of your post in The Message. I really liked what it says and wanted to share with you.
In Him, All Things!
.cm
People with their minds set on you, you keep completely whole,
Steady on their feet, because they keep at it and don't quit.
Depend on God and keep at it because in the Lord God you have a sure thing.
Isaiah 26:3-4 (MSG)
You are absolutely amazing as you trust God's hand in all of this. I have no doubt your next scan will be as amazing as the first...if not better. I, too, am praying for your WBC's to rebound and for you to feel WELL. I love you, my friend!
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